Jesse to negotiate with Syria?

Je$$e Jack$on To Lead Middle East Delegation
Jackson To Meet With Political, Religious Leaders To Discuss Journalists' Kidnapping, Other Developments

I'm thinking that a fly on the wall over in Syria might just hear the following bits and pieces of the conversations...
bzzzzz.... "Come on Asshad, I ain't had no press since I sprung them brawlin' Decatur 5 back in '99, Let's work this out... First, let's get the lighting right...
Is that camera on? Why not?? Turn it on right now, you simple Al Jezerra raghead! I LIVE FOR THAT!...
I'm telling you if you don't work with me on this, you'll have to listen to Jimmy Carter whining or maybe Cindy screeching when I leave..." bzzzz.....